Sunday Stealing: Family

Linking with Bev and the gang of thieves for Sunday Stealing today.

Stolen from Print/Discuss

1. How big is your immediate family? Who are the members? I consider my immediately family to be Tim and I, our daughter, her husband, their two kids, my mom and step-dad...and our son and his wife and two kids, but they don't speak to us so that's a whole other story.

2. Who are you closest to in your family? What kind of relationship do you have with that person? Is it like friendship?  I'm closest to my husband. He is my best friend as well as my husband. After him, it would be our daughter. I see her nearly every day since she lives next door and she comes to me about everything.

3. Which day of the year are you most likely to spend with your family?  Every day. We are close.

4. As a child, did you go on family trips? What do you remember about those vacations?  My parents weren't really the family vacation types. We did a camping trip to Niagara Falls when I was five. I don't remember anything but being on the Maid of the Mist in a thunderstorm. Then when I was 12 we did a driving trip through New England. It was a week long, not really long enough to do anything but the driving...which as a 12 year old I found incredibly boring.

5. Is there a black sheep in your family? What is different about them?  I suppose that would be our son by default. No one ever treated him that way, but he rejected everything about how he was raised and where and what and who he came from. Unless we are willing to change who we are to fit who he thinks we should be, he doesn't want us in his life.

Also, my husband is the black sheep in his family. His dad always treated him (and our children) differently and though they'd deny it, his sisters do, too. It's made him rather standoffish with them for most of his life. Now that they are older and two siblings have passed away he is letting them in a little more.

6. Do you know your extended family? How many of them have you met?  I've at least met all of them, but we aren't really close as everyone is so spread out.

7. Have you ever been to a family reunion? How was it?  My adopted father's family had a family reunion every year for something like 60 years. They were tons of fun when I was a kid, but it was dwindling since the older family members were dying off and the younger cousins are so spread out that we don't really know each other or get together because there aren't many shared memories. The reunions ended when my aunt passed away because there wasn't anyone interested in taking over and keeping them going.

8. Who are you most proud of among your relatives? Who do you look up to?  I suppose I am proudest of our daughter. She was a real mess during her late teens and early 20's. There were times I despaired of what kind of life she would have, but she has gotten her act together and she and her husband have their own home and are raising two beautiful children. As for who I look up to...I can't think of anyone I put in that role.

9 What characteristics have you inherited from your parents? Do you look like them? Do you behave like they do?  Well, since meeting my biological father I can say that I look a lot like both of my parents. I don't really think I inherited any characteristics or that I act very much like either of them, though.

10. Does your family have any heirlooms? Will you inherit anything that has been in the family a long time?  There are a few things and yes, I am my mother's only child so if my stepdad passes before her, I will inherit everything...unless it ever becomes necessary to sell it all in order to get her into a nursing home. My bio father has gifted me with monetary gifts ever since I met him. His goal is to leave the world with nothing left for anyone to fight over. He is even donating his body to science.

11. What happens to old people in your family? Do they live with younger family members or move to a retirement home? How would you prefer to spend your old age?  Mostly, my family has been practical minded and not wanting to be a burden to their children, they go into nursing homes...if they don't pass away at a younger age than expected (typical of the men in the family, while the women live into their late 80's or even 90's). My mom even has insurance for that. Having worked in a nursing home, I hope I never have to live in one, but I don't want to be a burden, either, so I guess I hope I just don't wake up one day.

12. If you are married, how well do you get along with your in-laws?  My in-laws have been gone for quite some time. I was blessed to have a wonderful mother-in-law who I loved dearly and who claimed me as daughter number six. I could get along with my father-in-law, but I didn't like or respect him because of how he treated my husband and our children.

13. What do people mean when they say, “you can choose your friends, but you can’t choose your family”?  I suppose they mean that family is the people you get stuck with at birth, but I think many people create their own "family" with some good friends who they are closer to than family. We have had that at times in our life.

14. If you live far away from some members of your family, how do you keep in touch? How often do you communicate?  For those that I keep in touch with, it is generally through Facebook. Sometimes cards or letters are exchanged. My father and I write a lot of letters and I write a few back and forth with my sister. Other than my father it's pretty sporadic. 

15. Are you so close to any of your friends that you consider them to be like family?  Yes, there are a couple these days. We used to be part of a large group where we all considered each other family, but things happen, people move on, and things change. I am more selective about my chosen "family" these days so it isn't quite as big.